I write from a most perfect little corner of the world...Sanibel Island, Florida. My mom, brother and I have spent a week of perfect rest here on the island---shelling, beach walks, dolphin watching, , tackling puzzles, reading books, and laying my tired bones in front of the Gulf of Mexico for some good healing. Anxiety is far from me, at least for these few days. I miss Nate so much as he was unable to get off of work for this trip.

Two weeks ago Nate and I road-tripped to see Dr. Clohisy at Washington University in St. Louis. He was our second opinion once we put a hold on the February surgery. We had a three-hour visit with assessments, new x-rays, and some quality time with the doctor. We received some very devastating news news...that which I most dreaded. Dr. Clohisy confirmed my FAI (mushroom shaped femur) that was not shaved down during my August surgery and in addiction, confirmed that my August surgery was over-corrected. A failure.

Dr. Clohisy translated this to mean that indeed I will need a complete re-do of my LPAO, as well as a correction of my impingement this time around.

It's all so confusing and we have more questions even since we were there on Friday. Clohisy ordered a joint injection, a higher dosage of anti-inflammatory, and a different form of PT as to not focus on range of motion but instead new levels of strengthening. He believes that once we address the real joint issues, my bursitis will also decrease.

We are currently making plans to travel to Barnes Jewish Hospital in St. Louis for a late-April surgery. We are confident in Dr. Clohisy's abilities.

Amidst the crushing news, we received some exciting news. Dr. Ganz, the Swiss doctor who first created the PAO surgery, will be visiting Dr. Clohisy in mid-April and will be looking at approximately 10 cases while he is here in the United States. Dr. C generously added me to the list to be assessed by him while he's here. We're grateful for this surprising offer.

We are holding on and eager for new days ahead.

A new hipster friend recently sent me this caption from Robert Bailey's "The Wilderness Experience" which rings so true to our experience during these "unsettling and barren" days:

The wilderness is an experience of contrasts. Ity is an unsettled, barren, perilous area, but it is also a place where God IS. It is a difficult, lonely, unnerving site, but it is also a place where God DWELLS. It is a draining, exhausting, discouraging situation, but it is also a place where God HEALS and STRENGTHENS. It is a removed, desolate, debilitating condition, but it is also a place where God MOVES and LOVES.

For today, I will welcome this last day on the island and receive this version of God's comfort (where God IS).

I'm off to shell...